To be completely honest, I don't even know where to begin in trying to wrap up my thinking around everything I have learned and experienced this semester. Despite having a rough semester in terms of the amount of work I had to complete and how mentally and emotionally demanding it has been, I recognize such a shift within myself and my understanding.
For starters, I am much more successful in reflecting. This is relevant to my teaching as I was able to immediately recognize aspects of my lessons that were not working and I was able to adjust on the spot. I was able to reflect after each individual group of students and make necessary adjustments based upon the things I noticed that worked well and what fell apart immediately. After teaching, my reflections were incredible. I recognized what I did well, where I could improve, and over time I began to make those adjustments. This process was SO clear in my lessons by the end of the semester as I feel like my final lesson is one I could actually teach again in the future with only a few tweaks and adjustments. I noticed aspects that worked well and where I needed to improve and I was able to actually do that. It was really rewarding for me to have that experience.
My ideas about teaching social studies have also changed dramatically. I always thought that social studies courses that are rooted in history have to be taught chronologically. That aspect always terrified me because I'm not a linear thinker and I would rather make connections over time than go through an entire school year only moving forward event by event. To learn that we can create thematic units that don't even necessarily have to focus only on world history or only on American history was such a relief. And you know, I've realized that it's probably a million times more interesting for students if it is planned out thematically (when it's done well, anyway). I feel so much better about becoming a social studies teacher after learning about thematic units and then getting real practice with creating one.
Regarding my unit plan, I feel really proud. My first draft of the unit plan feels like garbage compared to what it is now, but I can only imagine what my first unit plan would have looked like next year as a first-year teacher if I hadn't gone through this process now. There is still so much that I really need to hone in on and practice - I'm not even going to pretend that I'm good at assessments yet, that's a real area of struggle for me - but at least I know the starting point. I know that if I am asked to complete it, which I will be, then I know where to begin. I can also recognize in my unit plans where I need to improve, so I can always turn to my coworkers or other mentors to help me in that area if it's something that they really do well with. I've gotten better about asking for assistance and being okay with feedback, even if it's not something that I want to change.
A big part of me still really fears the thought of having my own classroom in eight months. Part of me still feels like I should be a middle school student again so I can redo everything, be a better and less strategically compliant student, and have a clearer vision of where I was going in life. Regardless of this feeling, I know that I'm ready. Every choice I've made in the last six years has brought me here and I wouldn't change it for the world. Now more than ever, I know that I should be a teacher. Within a few years, I'm sure I will become a good teacher. Mostly because I've had a ton of guidance and I have the skills that will make me always strive to work harder and be a better teacher because my students deserve it.
Student teaching: ready or not, here I come.
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